L.A. Times: So Marie Antoinette / Mitt Romney

So we're in a recession with sky-high unemployment, especially here in the City of Los Angeles, and what do the business geniuses at the  Los Angeles Times -- the ones who had to file for bankruptcy, mind you -- come up with as a marketing plan?

They want you to start paying for online content so that you can read what someone has to say about shrimp pumpkin dumplings he ate at some fussy restaurant. Seriously. Here's the mass email:

Oh yes, pretty please, take my money so I can spend my time savoring every word about some frikkin' restaurant at which none of us in L.A.'s dwindling middle class can even think about dining.

Hey, L.A. Times, you ever heard the one about eating cake because you're out of bread? No? How about the guy who doesn't actually watch NASCAR, but has friends who own NASCAR teams? Well, you just put yourself in the same league.

Someone needs some recession sensitivity training. These days, living large means springing for a super-sized meal that someone hands you through a window while you're in your car, burning up that five-dollar-a-gallon gas.

Shrimp pumpkin dumplings! You know what you can do with those, right?

You can get them "to go" of course. You didn't think I would imply something crude, did you?

Faking It: City Attorney Trutanich Pays For Phony YouTube Views Of His Campaign Videos

Some of the people who watched Trutanich TV

City Attorney Carmen Trutanich PAID a company to generate "views" of his YouTube videos as part of his campaign to become District Attorney.  So reports the Los Angeles Times.

Would you call that: a) pathetic; b) desperate; c) creepy; or d) all of the above? 


Did it never occur to Trutanich that, in a city where only 250,000 people bother to vote in local elections, it would be suspicious to generate over 700,000 views? If this guy can't even run his own conspiracy, how is he supposed to spot others'?


Great line from the article: "YouTube recently suspended the accounts of most of the users who left positive comments on the Trutanich videos, citing violations of its policy against commercially deceptive content."  Who wants a District Attorney who's "commercially deceptive?"


Hey, you think he'll hire young girls to faint at his concerts? I gather that worked for Sinatra in the early days.


Funniest fact from the article:   "To test how easy it is to buy views, The Times paid two online sites a total of $103 to generate views for a nearly two-minute video of paint drying. In eight days, the clip drew 60,000 views."


What's next? Will he hire extras to attend his rallies, or just use cardboard cut-outs?

When Life Hands You Lemons: What To Do About The Chevy Volt

You probably know by now the GM has shut down the Chevy Volt production line because, well, no one wants to drive a crummy car even with gas prices skyrocketing.

But shutting down the production line means more unemployment. We can't have that. So keep cranking out the Volts, and use them for a better purpose. They would make a lovely and artistic tourist attraction if fashioned into, say, a wall, in the desert. Where? How about the border with Mexico?

Memorial This Evening For Jamiel Shaw II

This evening, please join the family of the late Jamiel Shaw II for a candlelight vigil to remember this amazing young man.  

Jamiel was murdered four years ago today by an illegal alien gang member who had just been released back into the community, instead of deported, after serving time in jail for assaulting a police.  (Learn more at JamielsLaw.com.)

The following email from Jamiel's father tells you where and when:

In Memory of my Son, Jamiel Shaw II, we're having a Candlelight Vigil.  As many of you know, Jamiel was brutally murdered in 2008.  We continue to miss him deeply; he will never be forgotten!!   

 When: March 2, 2012 @ 6:00pm - 7:00pm  

Where: 2136 - 5th Avenue

Los Angeles, CA  90018

 We thank you for your continued support and we hope you will be able to attend!  Sincerely  Jamiel Shaw, Sr.

I'll be there, but I'll probably arrive late because today I'll be working quite some distance away.

Villaraigosa Puff Piece: Et Tu, New York Times?

Have you read the article in the New York Times entitled "Los Angeles Mayor's Sets Sights On A Bigger Stage?" 


The reporter, Adam Nagourny, interviewed and quoted Maria Elena Durazo, the executive secretary treasurer of the Los Angeles County Federation of Labor, A.F.L.-C.I.O.: 

“In the last year, I think he’s settled down to become much more thoughtful,” she said. “The ideas that he’s pushing forward, he’s really been focused on them. Maybe he learned some stuff from the first few years.”

The reporter also interviewed Villaraigosa, noting, "The mayor was, as usual, dapperly attired but looked fatigued, with lines on his face that were not there seven years ago."


Hey, New York Times, instead of just writing a puff piece where you ask Villaraigosa and his union supporters what kind of job he's done, perhaps you'd like to pick up the phone and talk to the loyal opposition about his record. You know, like, say, someone who ran against him for Mayor? Just a friendly suggestion.


You told your readers he was "dapperly attired." Okay, I suppose that's important to. . . someone?  (P.S.  The phrase "dapperly attired" is redundant, isn't it?)


You did say he was fined for accepting free tickets.  But you omitted to mention that local and state ethics agencies imposed tens of thousands of dollars in fines against him for accepting tens of thousands of dollars worth of tickets from corporations to which he directed millions of tax dollars in subsidies. Those tickets, moreover, let him get free and favorable publicity during an election year. Doesn't that seem like something your readers should know?

Trutanich Claims He Was Endorsed By United Federation Of Planets

Federation President denies endorsing Trutanich

Los Angeles City Attorney Carmen Trutanich claimed he was endorsed by the United Federation of Planets in his quest to jump from his very first elected office to a second one before finishing his term.

However, the President of the United Federation of Planets denies that the group has endorsed any of the candidates running to replace Cooley as Los Angeles County District Attorney.

Okay, not exactly. But, according to the L.A. Times, he did falsely claim several real organizations had endorsed him, along with one non-existent group.

Hey, isn't there some kind of law about making false representations of material fact, and using others' names for publicity?

David Goldstein Reveals City Hall's Yacht Monday At 11:00 p.m. On Channel 2

This Monday night, stay up for the 11:00 p.m. news on CBS Channel 2, because David Goldstein will show you how the Port is squandering your money on a yacht!

Yeah, yeah, the port doesn't tax you directly, but all the fees they heap on shippers get passed on to you the consumer, and give shippers added incentive to divert their business to other ports.

Plus, excuse me, but a yacht?!